Rihaan
“Hey brother! How have you been? Why haven’t you called in so many days? All fine?” Rihaan asked his best friend on the phone as he opened his oven. Maggi tasted best while chatting with Naman. It wasn’t habit. After four years, it was tradition.
“Been thinking, mate” Naman said, in his characteristic subdued tone. Rihaan shook his head in resignation. That was one of the things that never changed. He decided to cheer Naman up.
“Thinking, have we now?” He smirked, looking for a clean spoon, “Now didn’t we promise each other never to do that?”
“Not academics man. That won’t change.” Rihaan thought he heard a smile, but couldn’t be sure.”Tell me something… How does it feel to be a heartless bastard?”
Rihaan bit his lip. This was one conversation that never took place. Did any of the girls talk to Naman? Did his sensitive side want to teach Rihaan a lesson? Wait a second, did he even break any chick’s heart recently? What was Naman thinking?
“Its awesome. But you already knew that… cuz you know, I’m awesome. But why do you ask?”
“No don’t be vague. I mean, is it like hard? You know, to be with a girl, and not love her, from the heart?”
“Not actually. I mean, I do it all the time. Most people do.”
“Most people do?” Naman sounded surprised, “How?”
“Dude, come on. You don’t date a person you love.”
“I do…”
“You know I did not mean you. And you know that love at first sight doesn’t exist. People date so they can get to know each other. Because they like each other. Even early into the relationship both of them do not LOVE each other. Its only well into the relationship that true love even blossoms. If it does, that is.”
“So you are trying to sell me the love doesn’t exist theory?”
“No you will never accept that, and that’s a closed loop anyway. I am saying that being in a relationship without actual feelings for the girl or the guy is quite commonplace.”
“And as much as you might want to bend the ends of the conversation, you still know what I meant. Is it bad to be in a relationship, the way you are?”
“Firstly I do not like the suggestion that I am a worse boyfriend than most others. And two, whether it is a bad thing or not is subject to the perception of the viewer.”
“In your case, almost the entire world feels what you do is wrong and bad. Does it not affect you?”
“Alright. Who is it? Hina? Or Veronica? Who talked to you?”
Naman stayed silent, and Rihaan kept staring at the wall, forgetting the cooling Maggi in front of him.
“Dude, I think you know me. You can’t judge me on basis of what they said.”
“Trust me Bhai. This is not about you. Its about me.”
“Excuse me? What does being heartless have to do with you?” Rihaan racked his brain trying to figure the riddle out. Naman was the most emotional, genuine person he knew. He was like Rihaan’s bipolar entity. He would fall in love very easily, and would give his heart out to that person. He was a person to whom everyone else became secondary to love, maybe even their friendship. Why would he be talking about all this?
“What’s going on, Naman?” Rihaan asked, concerned. Naman breathed heavily, but kept silent. Rihaan blinked. Matters must be serious. Naman never hesitated in telling him anything.
“I’m thinking of taking a vow.” He said quietly. Rihaan tensed. Naman hardly vowed. But if he did, it usually was a permanent thing. Like the time four years back he had vowed never to tell a lie. And he hadn’t. Ofcourse he had found a way around that glitch, but that was besides the point. He needed to deal with this delicately. No time for jokes.
“What are you thinking about?” He asked cautiously.
“I’m thinking of locking my heart out.”
“Till…?”
“Forever.”
“Okay… And what drove you to this decision?”
“Many things… I mean, I keep breaking my heart for nothing. It’s the story of my life.”
“What do you mean? You love, and you are true to it. Its your strongest quality. Why would you want to leave it? Are you even sure you’ll be able to do it? I mean, it is you we are talking about.”
“No, Rihaan. I fall in love, and always, without exception get my heart broken – rejected. That is what defines me.”
“Come on, man. That’s not true. What about Smiti? She didn’t reject you. You were with her for the entire of your high school years.”
“So you want to take the example of the girl who broke my heart so bad I had to run away from home? She is the reason you are talking to me over the phone, and I am not there sharing your Maggi.”
Rihaan grimaced, “She didn’t reject you, Naman.”
“Dumping is a form of rejection, Rihaan.” Naman said hotly, “Take anyone, everyone… whenever I have opened my heart to someone, I have been handed only broken pieces of my heart. I am tired of collecting them, gluing them back together, and then handing them over on a platter for another hammering.”
“What about Pooja?” Rihaan asked hopefully. She was Naman’s latest crush, for a few months now. He had told her his feelings, and she hadn’t thrown him away yet.
“She… well she said a few words, and now I am being ignored. For a week now.”
Ah… that would explain his behavior. This was a situation that demanded control right now, he could not waste time. This was his best friend.
“She hasn’t rejected you, right?” He asked.
“Not in words, no. But her actions speak for her. And I must hand it to her. This hurts more than the rest.”
“You say that everytime.”
“That’s cuz it hurts worse everytime. I’m only human, Rihaan. I can only take so much pain. And you’re right, I am not capable of going into celibacy, or become a sanyasi and right women away from my life.”
“Then what are you doing?”
“I am planning… on becoming more like you.”
The phone fell from Rihaan’s hand and hit the Maggi. He blinked, too shocked to even think. Then he picked it up and put it to his ear, not noticing the sauce that had soiled the keypad touching his ear and cheek.
“Naman, don’t joke.”
“No jokes, Bhai. I’m serious. You lead the perfect life. Chicks, happiness, enjoyment… even love. All without the vulnerability. Its perfect. It is the answer to my heart’s pain.”
“But… It makes me a sadistic heartless bastard. Your words man!” Rihaan exclaimed, alarmed at the edge in his voice. Naman on the other hand, sounded eerily calm.
“Sure it does. And that is what I always held against you, true. But Rihaan, now I can see why you are like this. It may not be moralistic, not even right. But its practical. All it takes to survive, right mate?”
All it takes to survive. Rihaan breathed in deep, and held it for a while. The idiot was using his own words against him. And praising him, no less. How would he make him understand?
“Dude, come on. You are supposed to be the good one. My better half.”
Naman kept silent. Rihaan sighed, “Not in the mood of jokes, are we?”
“I am serious man. Your way is the best way. I think I’ll take it up.”
“Naman. Please. I am what I am as a result of my circumstances.”
“Rihaan, these circumstances deserve a reaction too. My heart can not take one more break.”
“They do… I agree. But not this. You are a caring person. You put others in front of you. Because you love them. That’s what defines my best friend.”
“No what defines your best friend is that he always gets his heart broken. Then repairs it. And then gets it broken again. I can not take it anymore. I cannot, Rihaan.”
Rihaan wasn’t really listening. He was already thinking ahead. He needed help to convince Naman. But who would he listen to?
“Naman, promise me something.”
“What?”
“That you won’t make this vow, or even think along such lines for another week.”
“I am already thinking bro.”
“Then don’t act on it. Give me a week.”
“What will change in a week? Will Pooja resume talking to me? I doubt it.”
“Lots can happen in a week. I think I might be able to find you reason not to do this. Please.”
“Fine. A week. I don’t see what changes though.”
“Thanks, bro. I’ll get back to you after lunch.”
“You are gonna eat Maggi without me?” Naman sounded amused.
“Love you too bhai.” Rihaan said and cut the call. Next he started rummaging through his phonebook.
He dialed a number, and waited for it to be attended.
A woman picked up, “Hello?”
“Sreeni akka? Rihaan here. I need your help.”
No comments:
Post a Comment